Kate says, 'My Patrick is such a saint. He works hard, doesn't smoke, and he hasn't so much as looked at a woman in over two years.'
Lorna responds, 'Well, my Francis is a saint himself. Not only hasn't he not looked at a woman in over three years, but he hasn't touched a drop of liquor in all that time.'
'My word,' says Kate, 'You must be so proud.'
"St. Patrick's Day is an enchanted time - a day to begin transforming winter's dreams into summer's magic." ~Adrienne Cook
ReplyDeleteThis comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDelete(I effed the last one up:)
ReplyDeleteJesus was Irish
1. He had 12 drinking friends.
2. He trained as a carpenter to work on the buildings.
3. He was unemployed.
4. He lived with his mother until he was 33.
5. He thought his mother was a virgin.
6. His mother thought he was God.
May you live to be 100 years, with one extra year to repent.
ReplyDeleteWe drink to your coffin. May it be built from the wood of a hundred year old oak tree that I shall plant tomorrow.
May the doctor never earn a pound out of you.
May the good Lord take a liking to you...
But not too soon!
May you die in bed at 95, shot by a jealous spouse.
And my personal favorite:
May those that love us, love us.
And those that don’t love us,
May God turn their hearts.
And if he doesn’t turn their hearts,
May he turn their ankles,
So we’ll know them by their limping.
-Tish 1/4 pure Irish
OMG, you guys are killing me!!! I laughed so hard, thank you both!!!
ReplyDeleteI am having 1 green beer today in honor of Paddy's Day and Bri's birthday. My husband is 39 today kids, I wish I was too!
Everybody keep your shilales in plain site today-
Judes, tell Bri that your BB says happy birthday. oh, to be 39 again...shit, to be 49 again!!!
ReplyDeletebtw, what the hell is a shilale? if it's what i think it is, mine is difficult to hide! LOL
ReplyDeleteeven more from the trenches of the AT:
ReplyDelete42.
Roc Thu, Mar 17, 2011, 11:20 AM
Patricia/Judes * LOL!!!
43.
waiting4godot Thu, Mar 17, 2011, 2:42 PM
hey Judes, do u prefer Mary Kay? *** btw, don't u remember giving me your meds last nite?
44.
lfj Thu, Mar 17, 2011, 3:16 PM
Yeah, Judes, Roc, and Patricia! You go, guys!
45.
ljf Thu, Mar 17, 2011, 3:17 PM
As well as waiting4godot!
46.
waiting4godot Thu, Mar 17, 2011, 5:03 PM
lfj, can't believe u didn't mention me first!!!! u know i'm the leader of the "Toothy Cult".
waiting4godot Thu, Mar 17, 2011, 5:04 PM
btw, lfj, say "hi" to itsjake...she used to be one of us.